Friday, September 28, 2007

Facing reality

I'm feeling suicidal. I don't think that there is any likelihood of my carrying that feeling through to action, but the feeling is there. And of course, it shouldn't be. Or, at least, we don't want it to be.

Part of the reason, I guess, is that my counselling sessions have finished. They have made a difference. Especially it has helped knowing that I have somebody to talk to. Somebody who will listen.

I haven't implemented any of the suggestions which my counsellor made in the last couple of sessions. There is something to be said for not trying them all at once. So, one at a time. First step, go back to my GP. Bring her up-to-date with what has been happening. Ask her to find out if there are resources - e.g. support groups - locally.

And be honest. I'm still struggling. I don't know if I'm going to make it.

2 comments:

ragaMuffin said...

I have made an appointment to see my GP. Progress.

Karin said...

Hey Chas, not sure what to say.

I hope you aren't likely to act on your suicidal thoughts. I have what I would call mildly suicidal thoughts at times. I think they are because I feel overwhelmed by a situation or can't see a positive way forward. For me they don't last long and positive thinking usually kicks in fairly soon afterwards.

If yours occur for similar reasons then you probably need to keep working at ways to stop situations from overwhelming you, ways to learn to cope and start to see a more positive future - because the future can probably be quite good once you sort a few things out.

I think for me life isn't really so bad but my current situation causes me anxieties about what the future might hold and also to question myself, but a reality check usually helps me to see things aren't so bad.

Your situation is different from mine. Things probably aren't as bad as you think they are but it may be harder for you to think positive at the moment.

Going back to the GP sounds like a good way forward, although be prepared for a bit of a wait if you won't be going to a counsellor privately. Also be prepared to persevere if doctor tries to fob you off or can't give details of a suitable counsellor.

You can beat it, it will just take time.

(((Chas)))