Hallowe'en

At the last moment, went out with the children - trick-or-treat-ing. People were kind. The funny thing was - there is a cat which has got into the habit of visiting us - it turned up, and tagged along ...

Suddenly, it's dark

The clocks went back on Sunday (reminds me - the central heating is still in summer time), bringing a welcome lightening to the mornings. But my journey home now takes place in darkness.

Loaded performance

I put the radio on in the kitchen; I recognised (eventually) the music - it was Britten's "Cello Symphony". I can't listen to this music without thinking of two things - that the theme of the last movement sounds suspiciously like part of "Three Blind Mice" - and that the piece was introduced to me by a lad who died of an aneurism when he was just 18.

I waited until the end, and was interested to learn that the cellist on this occasion was Alban Gerhardt, whose career I have followed since he was a BBC New Generation Artist, and that the conductor was John Adams, one of the few contemporary composers who can actually write music that I can listen to.

Like a teenager

As my son (who is not yet a teenager) said to me on Friday, "You don't understand my life!"

I've been, with my family, to a ceilidh. Other people appear to enjoy ceilidhs; in fact, to the other people there it probably appeared that I was enjoying myself. But at this point I feel so utterly drained that ... well, you probably don't want to hear the rest. I'm not sick; I'm not ill. It's just that these events work differently for me - I have to put so much effort in that by the end I have nothing left.

I'll be OK; this'll pass. I don't mind enduring something that is recognised as being horrible - like going to the dentist. But it seems so unfair to have to endure something that, I assume, is meant to be fun.

Sometimes Web 2.0 just baffles me

I've just come across picnik, which offers online editing of photos. It looks really nice, and does a good job.

One of my cameras, recently purchased, is an Olympus mu 760 (I believe that in the States it is called a Stylus). On the whole, I'm impressed, but I notice (and this appears to be a 'feature' of Olympus cameras) that the blues are somewhat intense. Until now, and I want to retain the policy, my 365 photos have been unedited, but this makes me wonder ...

Before:


After:

Waterfall

I took this picture several days ago, in a riverside garden in Perth, Scotland.

Another time related question

How are we to start the 'getting to bed' process at 8 o'clock if daughter finishes Guides at 9 o'clock?

A long day

I leave the house at about a quarter to eight in the morning, and get back at around a quarter to seven in the evening - why?

What about

... a stress free evening? (meaning, of course, that this one wasn't - although the whisky helped)

Back to questioning the sustainability of it all

Just about got through the day, though not feeling great, possibly due to a virus, then home to a son who seems determined to be disobedient in every circumstance.

Autumn sunshine

Back to work to-morrow - difficult to think about anything else ...

On the spur of the moment

A letter from our local theatre arrived in the post this morning, encouraging us to come out this evening to a dance performance. At the insistence of our children, we did, and, on the whole, enjoyed the event, especially the second half. Our son attends a hip-hop class, so we hope that he found the experience inspiring.

Footprints on the beach

The good news is ...

My mother phoned us this evening to say that her move went well. She is still living in her old house, but the furniture which is to be in the new house was transferred to-day.

We had a pretty good day, I guess. Maybe not much to show for it, but with school and work starting again next week, to-day was perhaps the last easy day before swinging back to work mode.

Chores

Spent the morning working through the pile of stuff on my desk - I actually think that we've gained control - there are things to be done, but we know what they are. In the afternoon, I helped my daughter with her school project, and then we went food shopping.

Home again

A morning with the children on South Inch; a rather pleasant lunch out; and then a reasonable drive home - the car full (we have taken some stuff away from my mum's house).

A poignant moment earlier this morning, when I came across a box of my father's diaries, and read his entry for the day that my youngest brother was born.

Swimming

Perth has a rather splendid leisure pool; I took the children swimming this morning; this afternoon, we've been helping my mother to get ready for her flitting.

Each to his or her own on Sunday morning

The silvery Tay
Originally uploaded by Glaswegian

Our daughter enjoys church, but our son doesn't. So I dropped my wife and daughter at the church, then took my son on a walk to the top of Kinnoull Hill. I'm attaching an old photo to this blog post; what this photo doesn't make entirely clear is that there is a sheer drop from the hilltop to the river valley below. My son nearly gave me a heart attack as he negotiated a muddy path just inches away from the edge.

It's a long story

I find myself, unexpectedly, with Internet access tonight. Simply, we found that another family was booked to occupy the caravan which we thought that we would be staying in this week. We couldn't face going back home, so here we are at my mother's. I suppose that it is for the best.

Weariness

Too tired even to string a couple of sentences together; I'm going to be offline for a few days - we're off on holiday to-morrow.

Worn out

Helping my daughter with her homework - difficult to strike the right balance - help her, not do it for her!

Another day

Sorry to harp on about tiredness, but it really has been a dominant theme to-day. I made a silly mistake at work, trying to do too many things at once, not too serious, but not something I like to do. And I decided not to attend a leaving do.

On the whole, progress

Our daughter is out this evening; I've been able to spend some time at my desk and at the computer, basically catching up on stuff which needed to be done. My boss (at work) has spoken with the lady from occupational health, and now wants to speak with me. It will be an important meeting, but I'm not looking forward to it. I don't really know where I stand with my present boss - he seems (to me) to be too detached, though I guess that that is just his style.

I feel that I'm doing better at work, but I think that I need more time just to gain some confidence before I try to make any big decisions; I hope that my boss will understand that.

Why am I updating here?

It's a fair question. I have another blog, where I'm part of a community. I'm pretty sure that if I wrote there some of what I'm writing here, it would be read sympathetically. I do know that some people do read what I write here, and I really do appreciate that, too. I suppose that when I post a wiblog, I am conscious that I am contributing. I can't quite let myself go.

What I am trying to do here is simply to write a diary which happens to be online. To-day was tough, because I was tired. But I'm here, and as far as I know I didn't make any terrible mistakes (but I did lose my temper with my son this morning). And I can hear from the living room raised voices, so I'm not the only one who's struggling.

I saw my GP this morning, and was disappointed that she seemed intent on getting me out the door as quickly as she could. I'm not clinically depressed, and she could see that, so I suppose that from her point of view I was just wasting her time.

Harvest thanksgiving

Thankfully, the embarrassment potential of not bringing anything to the harvest thanksgiving service (as happened this morning, because we weren't in church the previous week, and didn't know) is less in our church, where items are placed on the tables before the service, and not carried to the front at some point in the middle. And we enjoyed lunch out in someone's house.

I'm concerned these days, however, that I don't have time to deal with the stuff which is accumulating on my desk.

How can we expect to remain sane?

The children have found a couple of blow-up beds, and are planning to camp tonight in the lounge. I simply don't have a strategy for getting them to sleep at a certain time. Even if I did, I'm too tired to implement it. This is one of the Catch 22s of parenting. At just the point where you really need to be strong and fresh (to get these children to go to bed, and to sleep), you yourself are tired, probably tireder than they are.

Maybe I should just take myself off to bed, and leave them to it ...

Progress

This morning, I saw the occupational health person at work. I'm hoping that she will help me to find a sustainable answer to the work problems which have been troubling me recently.

At this afternoon's team meeting, I volunteered to apply for a team wiki - our workplace are launching a wiki service using Confluence - it makes sense for us to get some experience if our users are likely to be asking us questions - time will tell whether I should have kept my mouth shut!

Our daughter is about to move from Brownies to Guides - she was telling me that she is both excited and sad.

Why can't I?

... put a picture in the middle of a blog entry, like this:

Trying again

Yesterday, Windows Live Writer wouldn't let me upload a photo to Blogger; I've updated Live Writer, and am trying again:

Monday morning

Enjoying the autumn sunshine - not particularly enjoying being at work - there seems to be lots to do - and it's all sorts of different things which don't seem to relate much to each other - difficult to see how to make progress ...